4 Months with the Little Miss!

This Little Love Bug is 4 months old today! I cannot believe it. I honestly feel like it was just yesterday that I was writing my 40 week bump update and just waiting for this little girl to arrive. This month has been interesting to say the least. We've had our fair share of good days and bad days but the good definitely outweighs the bad. 

Growth: We go in for our 4 month appointment tomorrow so I'm not sure what her exact height and weight are at the moment. She is definitely growing though. She is so long and heavy that it's getting a bit hard to carry her and definitely hard to carry her around in her car seat!

Feeding: Breastfeeding and still going strong! I'm so glad that we got this far...I was a little nervous that we wouldn't get here but Honey has been such a strong nurser from the get-go. I'm thinking that the Doc will give us the OK to start her on foods. I am so excited to start giving her poi regularly!

Sleeping: Did you know that 4-month sleep regression is a thing? And sometimes it starts a little earlier then 4-months? Yep...it's true and I know a little girl who is currently going through that. Honey has been an excellent sleeper since she was born. She's been sleeping through the night since 2 months so mommy and daddy have been spoiled! There have been a few days over the past few weeks where she'll wake up in the middle of the night like she did when she first came home. 

Her naps during the day has also been a bit shorter but she takes more naps so it's kinda a win. I'm glad that at least she's on a routine for her days--including nap and bedtime. On a normal day, she will go to bed at 8:30 and sleep until about 5:00. Her nap times are normally at 7:30, 10:00, 4:30, with a really short catnap at about 6.

Moods: Honey is really such a happy baby like 90% of the time but this month, her little moods have definitely come out! She loves being held and when people pay attention to her but she does not like being alone for too long. She is definitely still a happy baby but she is not afraid to make it known when she does not like something.

Clothes: She still fits some of her 0-3 month clothes but mostly she's in 3-6 month clothes now. We just cleaned out her closet and drawers and packed up most of her 0-3 month clothes...a lot of which I don't think she even wore, haha. It was just much too hot to put her in clothes all the time. Now that winter is finally here, I've been able to actually put her in clothes during the day.

Likes/Dislikes: Honey loves playing airplane, petting Lady, standing up, bouncing, looking at colorful books, her daddy's face, watching TV shows (Dancing With the Stars) or whatever video games her dad is playing, and touching everything she can get her hands on. She especially loves playing with her Minnie Mouse and Belle dolls.  She does not like loud noises, being alone for too long, still does not enjoy her car seat, and tummy time unless she can do tummy time on mommy's knees.

Etc.: She rolled from her back to her tummy for the first time but still hasn't quite mastered the art of turning from her tummy to her back. We put her hair in pigtails for the first time and she looks so cute! We also celebrated her first Halloween, she was Scrump--Lilo's doll from Lilo and Stitch. She is now able to stand up by herself in her exersaucer.

I can't wait for more months with my little girl!

Mommy Thoughts In the Face of Disaster

This weekend, I chose to refrain from posting on the blog to express a kind of ʻmoment of silenceʻ for the utterly devastating events that took place in Paris & other places throughout the world last week. I did have thoughts and things that I wanted to say but, because I was unsure about to express said thoughts, I decided that silence would be best...at least until I figured out what I wanted to say. Today, I am ready to express my thoughts and feelings. I can only hope that what I have in my mind and my heart translates well...

Whenever I checked my Facebook on Friday, it seemed that bad news filled my feed. Earthquakes in Mexico and Japan, bombings in Baghdad and Beirut, and finally the terrorist attacks in Paris. In the span of 24 hours, nearly 120,000 lives were lost. 120,000 people who were sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, and friends. 120, 000 people who possibly had plans for their lives...suddenly gone. Needless to say, I held my daughter a bit closer and a bit longer that night.

(Source)

Late on that night as I was scrolling through my friendʻs status updates, a comment someone made caught my eye. I canʻt remember what it said exactly but it was somewhere along the lines of: "Even if I wanted kids, I wouldnʻt want to bring them into a world like this."

That made me stop and think.

I thought about my daughter and about this timeframe in which she was born. I worried that things like this--bombings, natural disasters, wars, and rumors of wars--would be the norm of her childhood. I wondered if I was wrong to bring her into the world at a time like this when it seems that unrest and fear is prevalent throughout the world. I worried that there was nothing that I could do to protect her from all the things that were wrong with the world.

Then I stopped to pray. I prayed for those throughout the world who were hurting that night--who would be hurting for days, months, years even, on end. I prayed for the lives that were lost and I prayed for those who lost friends and family members in the horrific events that occurred. I prayed that their hearts and minds would be comforted and that, in their time of need, they would see the good in the world...that they would be healed with time and love. I prayed for the first-responders and all the emergency personnel who would be on the scene to help those who were affected by the events.

And I prayed for myself. I prayed for the comfort to know that my daughter was born at this time for a reason. I prayed for the strength and the faith to raise my daughter to be a good, kind person. I prayed that I would be able to see the good in the world and that I would be able to teach her that there is good out there. I prayed for my sweet little girl. I prayed that, though she may see injustice and fear and unrest and hatred, that she would know who to look to for love, kindness, peace, and justice.

(Source)

Being a mom is so, so scary without having to worry about all the horrible things going on in the world today. Trust me, I worry nearly every single moment of every single day about my kid. But through my prayer, I found comfort. 

Even though there isnʻt much I can do regarding natural disasters or terror attacks, there are things that I can do for my daughter...to help her stand strong and faithful in the face of these kinds of things. I can teach her to pray and to rely on her Heavenly Father. I can teach her to be compassionate and service minded. I can instill in her a love to serve others in her every day life so that when things like this happens, she will have the desire to serve them. I can teach her to seek comfort from her Heavenly Father or from those around her when things that scare her happens. I can be there for her to explain to her that these things do happen, but that it should not affect her view of the world. I can show her that goodness does exist in the world. I can be her example of good. 

Iʻm sure that, at some point, every parent has wanted to lock their kid in a room where they canʻt get hurt and nothing bad can ever happen to them. Unfortunately, we canʻt do that...we can only hope to teach and show our kids the best things about the world that we live in.

Bookish & Not-So-Bookish Thoughts

01. I hadnʻt gotten around to sharing our Halloween costumes here on the blog yet, so there it is. We were Lilo, Stitch, and Liloʻs doll Scrump. I made all of our costumes (Joshʻs hat, my dress, babyʻs beanie). It has got to be my favorite Halloween costume of all time...mostly cause Honey is the CUTEST Scrump ever. 

02. Remember, remember the fifth of November...is that stuck in anyone elseʻs head today or is that just me? I have the sudden urge to start a revolution. Iʻm not sure what Iʻm rebelling against, but letʻs do this.

03. Also, is anyone else freaking out about J.K. Rowlingʻs announcement that sheʻs working on another childrenʻs book? Honestly, Iʻm not a fan of Joʻs adult fiction stuff, but Iʻm 99.9% sure that I would love another childrenʻs book from the woman that gave us Harry Potter and subsequently changed my life.

04. Even though itʻs definitely good on my wallet, Iʻm kinda bummed that November is such a slow month for anticipated book releases (for me at least). 

05. I may have gone a bit overboard on the whole book buying thing last month though, so at least Iʻll have somewhat of a break this month since Iʻm not really looking forward to anything big this month!

06. I am, however, looking forward to Winter by Marissa Meyer and The Bassoon King: My Life in Art, Faith, and Idiocy by Rainn Wilson. I may also pick up After You by Jojo Moyes. I already have so much to read (but not too much...thereʻs no such thing as too much to read).

(via)

07. ^^^^ That will always be true about me. 

08. I made edible cookie dough today (eggless cookie dough) because Iʻve been craving that so much lately. It was good, but it somehow wasnʻt exactly what I wanted. Iʻm a little disappointed but eh. I guess that just means Iʻll have to try a new recipe next time. Anyone got good eggless cookie dough recipes?

09. Iʻm dying for cold weather to get here already! Itʻs still so ridiculously hot here and I am so over it. They say that this heat/dryness is going to last until possibly late December. Thatʻs not okay, weather. El Nino can go away now, thanks.

10. These Buzzfeed articles about life and music in the 2000s are making me feel nostalgic. Man, the early 2000s were definitely a different (dare I say better) time.

11. Iʻm super thankful that Josh has Wednesdays off. I enjoy hanging out with him and baby all day on Wednesdays without having to worry about things needing to be done, etc. Itʻs also nice having another person around to help take care of baby, especially since sheʻs going through a developmental leap and has been exceptionally grumpy lately. 

12. Iʻm currently getting ready to start Christmas shopping. This year, I want to buy more from small businesses, etsy shops, instagram shops, mom & pop stores, and direct sales consultants rather than going to the ʻbig businessesʻ. As a small business owner myself, I understand first hand how EVERY little cent helps support an actual family. If you have any suggestions that fit the criteria, leave me links to their shops/sites in the comments! I would love to check it out :D

Linking up with Christine over at Bookishly Boisterous

Becoming Mama

The last post that I wrote before disappearing for a few months was a 40 week pregnancy update post. I re-read it last night and all the memories of being 40 weeks pregnant came flooding back to me. I remember being so anxious to meet my little girl, worried about what labor was going to be like, tired of being so huge,  and exhausted because I couldnʻt sleep because I was too busy thinking too much about all those other things. I wanted her out right then and there so that I could stop expecting and start being mama.

Well, baby girl was born less than 24 hours after I posted that! We had gone in for my 40 week check up that day knowing that it was very possible (even likely) that baby would be baking for another week or 2. I didnʻt think that I could handle that. I met with the midwife that day fully prepared to ask her to sweep my membranes. My sister told me that she had them do that during her first pregnancy and my niece was born the next day. Well, I ended up not having to at all.

My blood pressure was high. The midwife was nervous that I was in the beginning stages of preeclampsia. I had been tested for it a few weeks earlier, but the doctor wasnʻt worried so they didnʻt do anything about it then. In all honesty, my blood pressure was probably high because I was so stressed out about whether or not it was time for baby to come. But, since high blood pressure runs in my family, it was better to be safe than sorry. The midwife decided to send me in to labor and delivery where they could better assess my situation and decide what to do from there.

So off we went to the hospital!

hospital Tasia, obviously thrilled to be hooked up to all sorts of machines.

At the hospital, they monitored my blood pressure for a couple of hours before they decided to induce me. They started with Prepidil to help things move along, then moved to Pitocin after a few hours. Honestly, by this point I had lost all track of time. All I really remember is that my water broke at about 6:00pm while I was using the bathroom.

I got an epidural at about 10:30/11:00 at night.

Because babyʻs heartbeat was cutting in and out during contractions, my nurse stayed in my room practically all night.

Thankfully, Josh and I got a little bit sleep...even if it was just a few minutes here and there.

At 7:00 the next morning, the doctors and midwives decided that I was ready to push. After about half an hour or so of pushing, our daughter was born. She was 7 lbs 10oz and she was 19.25 inches long. She was perfect. She still is perfect.

THESE. They helped sooo much!

Honestly, labor and delivery didnʻt go as I had planned. I had wanted to labor in the labor tub but since they had to monitor me and baby the whole time, I couldnʻt do that. I had wanted to give birth naturally--no drugs, but because the contractions came fast and HARD I decided that the pain was too much for me and I got the epidural.  I had wanted to go in to labor naturally but because of the risk of preeclampsia, it was much safer to get the medical help that my body needed (also, she would probably still be chilling in their right now if she could be, haha). I thought that labor would last much, much longer because I was induced but it ended up being quick and (fairly) easy.

I thought a lot of things about how it would all go down. Iʻm the kind of person who needs to know every last detail of the plan before even agreeing to something. But I guess when it comes to bringing a child into the world and then raising that child, you canʻt know every last detail of the plan. You agree to the unknown. I canʻt complain though. My unknown brought me this:

Lilia was born on July 22, 2015 at 7:45 am weighing 7lbs and 10oz at 19.25 inches long

P.S. I feel like I need to mention how much of a champ Josh was during the whole L&D process. Even though he was tired, nervous, and worried about me he was absolutely amazing. He stayed next to me, holding my hand the entire time. He was the one who walked me to the bathroom (when I was able to walk around) and rubbed my back as I was showering. He was the restocker of essential oils in the diffuser. He talked to everyone on the phone when I couldnʻt. When it was time to push and I felt like I couldnʻt do it, he kept insisting that I could. He was the first to see Lilia and he cried when he cut the cord. I couldnʻt have asked for a better delivery couch or a better daddy to my girl.

40 Weeks: Bye Girl, Bye!

Happy Due Date to Me! 

Maybe? Kinda? Happy? Erm...Maybe not so much.

Honestly, I didn't think that I would write up this blog purse. Like ever. Mostly because I didn't have a blog at all this pregnancy and therefore did not think of writing this post. But also because I didn't think that this pregnancy would actually last this long.

Seriously. I thought this kid would be out like a month ago.

But alas, she is not here yet and therefore this post IS here. Enjoy!

How far along are you?: 40 weeks, 0 days...like I said earlier, today is my due date! Also, like I said earlier, I didn't think that I would be writing this post. If I had been writing posts like these from the beginning of my pregnancy, I probably wouldn't have thought that I would be writing this post! I was convinced that Little Miss would come much earlier then expected, but I was wrong and she obviously has a mind of her own already. Help me.

How are you feeling?: Tired, tired, tired. I'm also feeling a bit frustrated at this point in the waiting game because there's really nothing to report at all. Aside from a few Braxton Hicks here & there as well as some pressure in my pelvis (TMI? Sorry.), literally nothing is happening. It's killing me knowing that I'll be seeing my baby girl in just a few days but it's not happening right now and I really, really want it to happen RIGHT now. 

Total Weight Gain: As of my appointment last week, I am up about 20, maybe 25 LBs. I'm pretty happy about that. I was struggling with weight gain toward the middle of my pregnancy, but I'm glad that it's all under control now and I've barely gained weight in the latter half.

How Big Is Baby?: According to TheBump, Little Miss is as big as a watermelon. And weighs between 6.2 and 9.2 lbs. I'm hoping she's closer to the 6/7 lb mark because....I'm already nervous of having to push a watermelon out as it is.

Maternity Clothes: Honestly, the only maternity clothes that I own are maternity dresses that I bought from Motherhood a few months back. Oh and maternity shorts/cargo pants. Plus some shirts that my boss lent me. But since I'm not working right now and don't really feel the need to dress up much at all unless I'm leaving the house, I rarely wear 'em. My old dresses and most of my old shorts and tops still fit me just fine so I wear those around the house. If I even choose to wear pants, lol.

Stretch Marks: Yes. They run in my family and they are beautiful so there's that.

On Sleep: What is this sleep that you speak of? Seriously, though, I don't get enough...which is horrible because everyone keeps telling me to sleep now. Unfortunately, I cannot get comfortable AT ALL. I tend to sleep about 5 hours, tops, each night (falling asleep at 12 only to wake up at 5 is so not the business). And even when I take naps during the day, I only nap for about an hour and then I'm up again. It's great. Not really. 

Baby Movement: She's been super, super active lately...probably because she's just as frustrated as I am that there's no more room in there...but she's actually been super calm today. Hopefully, that means she's getting ready to go, go, go!

Food Cravings/Aversions: I've been craving smoothies and milkshakes...anything that goes down easily because eating actual food makes my stomach hurt. And fruits! And ice! And water! Anything light that doesn't make me feel like I'm going to puke my brains out after eating. As for aversions, FISH. Which makes me want to cry because I love fish. But the thought of sushi or poke or even cooked salmon makes me sick. I can't wait for that aversion to go away!

Belly Button In or Out: Still in. Probably never going to come out. Sad Tasia is sad.

What I Miss: Sushi. Haha...I know, I know...I JUST said that I'm not a fan of fish right now but that doesn't mean that I don't miss it! Also: medium rare steak, being able to see my feet, and sleeping on my stomach. 

Best Moment This Week: This week, I signed up to be a Younique Presenter in order to help bring in additional income for our family. I'm excited about this because these are products that I really love and I think that in order to sell something, you NEED to love it or you aren't going to go anywhere with it. Plus, I know that doing this will help me provide for Baby Girl and I only want to give her the world, ya know?

What I'm Looking Forward To: Having this kid already? Maybe not the actual labor and delivery part, but I am definitely excited to finally get to see and hold my girl for the first time. That's what pregnancy is all about, right? That first moment. I can't wait.

Milestone: "Officially" hitting Full-Term...even though I know it's technically official at 37 weeks, getting to 40 weeks is definitely an accomplishment!

And...I guess that's it! Hopefully, the next time that I get to post, I'll be a Mama!